The New Word for Next Year

I recently heard that the word for this year 2008, is bailout. This is followed by vet, vetted, or any derivitive. From my experience it would have to go to vetted. This is because I had never heard the term until this election season. As soon as I heard it, I noticed many people using it at work in meetings, unnecessarily I might add. I find both of these words obnoxious and irritating.


Anyway, I'm starting the ball rolling on next year's word of the year. With your help we can make this happen. I came up with it on a fluke in my boss's boss's office while explaining some numbers. The word is:


Dramastically - When Dramtically and Drastically just don't quite get the point across by themselves.

Examples:

The pain in my back is reduced dramastically when I do my stretching exercises.


The fiscal impact is changed dramstically when the new found circumstances are taken into account.


I like this word. I think it has a nice ring to it. And has definitely has a lower irritation factor than the words bailout and vetted. So join with me, let's put out a dramastic effort to make this the 2009 word of the year. People will think you're clever and funny as I got quite a laugh when I used it.

Man "Loses" Phone at McDonald's; Wife's Nekked Pictures on Internet; They Sue McDonald's

Read the article.

Now I will discuss. Who takes nekked pictures of themselves with their cell phone over the age of 18? And who "looses" said cell phone in a public place? And if someone found that cell, would they really look for nekked pictures and then post them on the Internet?

My theory, and I know I'm not alone, is that husband and wife develop what they think to be a genius plot.
Step 1: Wife strips nekked
Step 2: Husband takes pictures with his phone in various "sexy" poses
Step 3: Husband goes to McDonald's for a Big Mac
Step 4: Take phone out of pocket
Step 5: Put phone on table while eating because you can't feel it vibrating in your pocket
Step 6: Finish stuffing face
Step 7: Get up to leave
Step 8: Leave phone clearly on the table
Step 9: Ignore any attempt to get your attention as you run as fast as you can to your car
Step 10: Speed off as fast as you can, not looking back
Step 11: Arrive home and call McDonald's
Step 12: Tell them you will come get the phone but whatever they do, don't look at the nekked pictures of your wife
Step 13: Retrieve the phone and return home
Step 14: Upload pictures to Internet
Step 15: Call sleazy lawyer and accuse McDonald's of causing you deep emotional distress and pain and suffering
Step 16: Call every paper in the country to tell them sob story
Step 17: Wait for Hugh Hefner to call
Step 18: Pimp wife out to pose for Playboy, her life long dream.
Step 19: Get divorced, because wife discovers she can do way hotter and richer than husband
Step 20: Go back to being poor schlub with nothing but your Big Mac to ease your pain and suffering.

That's how I envision it went/will go down. I'm sure I could be wrong. But I'd be shocked if I'm too far off their intentions.

Oh in case you didn't bother to read the article, this went down in Arkansas....Now does my version seem more likely??

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!!!!

Irish Cheddar Cheese

Sometimes my husband and I like to have our version of a special light supper, which usually consists of smoked salmon, which was and still is a bit of an acquired taste for me, but nonetheless I try it, crackers, and some kind of special cheese. Sometimes we throw in some kind of veggie or fruit if we feel like it. I usually pick out the cheese, and I try to pick something new, yet hopefully something that won't be a complete waste of money. Meaning at least one of us will finish it. So I've never purchased Limburger cheese even in the name of trying it. I fear the smell of ass might ruin it for us. So I figure it's best just to avoid it.

This last time I saw some Irish Cheddar cheese and thought, hey, it's cheddar so it's familiar, it's Irish, so it's different and we've never tried Irish cheese to our knowledge. I couldn't go wrong with this right? Well. It's ok, but Jay didn't much care for it. It's more sharp than he likes, and for me it's ok but I'm not in love. And I LOVE cheese. Either way I'm determined not to let it go to waste, so I will eat it even if it kills me.

This cheese has been sitting in our refrigerator for almost 2 weeks maybe more I think. So tonight as I was making my lunch for tomorrow, I thought I better take some for lunch in an effort to get rid of it. So I pulled it out of the baggy it's in, and a smell much more pungent than I remember wafted up my nose. Surely my nose was just stuffed up the first time around, but it got worse as I cut it. I fully expect it to take on the smell of feet by the time lunch arrives tomorrow, because it was almost there tonight. I'm still determined not to let it go to waste. It's not that old. I'll just make sure to wash it down with grapes. Hopefully they will be fermented grapes so I can make it through the afternoon at work.

What's your favorite cheese? Mine's Pecorino.

Things I Hate/Things I Love

Things I Hate (In no particular order)
-People wearing a blue tooth in their ear while not on the phone
-Rats
-My Job
-My Hair
-Stupidity
-Wasteful Spending
-Necessary Spending
-Swarms
-My Moments of Insanity
-Puss
-Insensitivity
-Inappropriate Sensitivity
-Hurting people's feelings
-Rejection
-Fear
-Gnats
-Shopping
-Speed Traps
-Speeding Tickets; especially for less than 11 miles over the limit
-My Feet
-Tooth Pain
-Food Poisoning
-Shoes
-My Irrationality
-Excuses
-Refusal to learn from mistakes
-Feeling trapped in a job
-That I'm not more of a risk taker
-Income Taxes
-Being Sad
-Not remembering details that other people do

Things I Love (In no particular order except the first 2)
-My Husband
-My Dog
-Ice Cream
-Thanksgiving
-My Friends
-My Family
-A good belly laugh
-A good sense of humor
-Having a genius moment of wit drawing roaring laughter from others
-Exercising
-$4 Sweaters
-Challenges
-Playing with dogs
-Sales Tax (as opposed to Income ala the Fair Tax)
-Being Outside
-Camping
-Religious Freedom
-Liberty
-Efficiency
-Being Valued
-Skiing (Snow and Water)
-Being Responsible
-Traveling
-How teenagers think they're soooo deep (I know I did)
-Lunch
-Brownies
-Cool Whip
-Nougat
-The Office (the TV show and the movie)
-Survivor
-Personal Responsibility
-Paying off debts
-Days off work
-America
-Good Memories
-Memory loss related to a painfully itchy allergic reaction to penicillin 11 years ago
-People who can be objective and open-minded
-Getting comments on my posts

Hated by a Rat

There's a rat at work that's out to get me. Either the rat's a human or the rat's actually a rat. We have a rat problem so that's highly possible. I've seen them and heard the screaming women down the hall that they have terrorized. So the hate against me started with an ivy plant. If you didn't read about this in my prior post, feel free to do so.
http://sunshineinsight.blogspot.com/2008/09/psycho-plant-killer-on-loose.html

I'm upset at the finality of my plant. I had to throw out what was left because after there was nothing left but dirt and roots, I came in a couple of different mornings and there was dirt spread out on my desk around the plant. So I figure some human hates me enough to dig at my plant, which is very vengeful, or some rat hates me enough to dig at my plant. Perhaps in search of water or food or whatever. Either way it's hateful.

So I had one plant left on my desk. A poinsettia. Yesterday I came in and rather than full stems being torn off, there were several leaves that looked like they had bites taken out of them. I don't know any humans snacking on poinsettias, but I do work for the government, so you just never know. Aren't poinsettias poisonous? Well if a rat ate it I might have successfully got one!!! Which you'd think they'd be dropping like flies since there are poinsettias all over the place since someone gave them out last year for Christmas.

This morning I came in and there was a chewed up piece of gum discarded on my floor. It looked like extra spearmint. It was that bright greenish yellowish color. It was no where near my trash can. So either someone decided it would be a great idea to spit out their gum on my floor or the rat got into a piece of gum somewhere and is now chewing it, and had no good way of getting to the trashcan level to properly dispose of it.

WHAT DID I EVER DO TO YOU RAT???? What can I do to make amends? Or kill you. Whichever you prefer. Just leave me alone!!! Stay away from my desk!! NO RATS ALLOWED!!! Take your gum at get out of the building. I'll buy you some gum if you'll just leave. But beware, I will lace it with rat poison for your chewing pleasure.